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WILL YOU MARRY ME (FOR TWO YEARS)?

 
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PostPosted: Sat Oct 08, 2011 10:23 pm    Post subject: WILL YOU MARRY ME (FOR TWO YEARS)?  Reply with quote



'Til two years do us part' may just be the new marriage vow. Well, at least in Mexico City, where they're considering a two-year marriage licence.

The licence would allow a temporary commitment of two years (no more, no less) after which the couple could renew their marriage indefinitely, or opt out of it without the costs and paperwork of a traditional divorce.

The romantic in me wants to say I think this is wrong—an idea that completely disrespects the intentions of marriage: everlasting love, commitment, comfort and security forever.

But the realist in me knows the statistics.

According to Statistics Canada, the current divorce rate in Canada hovers around 40 percent. In 2010, for the first time in Canadian history, there were more unmarried people than legally married people age 15 and over. By 2035, 38 percent of all marriages that took place in 2004 will have ended in divorce.

Why?

Because times have changed. Marriage was originally based on mutual need—men needed someone to take care of a household and raise their children, women needed men to take care of them financially. In the past, it was also socially unacceptable to have children outside of wedlock. Now, not only do we not need to get married to have babies, we don't even need to have sex—thanks to sperm banks. Increased life expectancy also means ‘forever' is a much bigger time commitment than it used to be. And, given the current state of the economy, families are struggling with debt, and people are being forced to work longer hours—putting a strain on their relationships and family life.

With these things (and the scary statistics) in mind, I can't argue that a two-year marriage licence isn't a practical idea.

In theory.

In reality, I'm not sure I'd say ‘I do' knowing there was a projected expiry date. Besides the fact that it takes the romance out of what should otherwise be an occasion celebrating eternal love, it also makes the usual practices surrounding a wedding confusing.

In your vows, would you still talk about loving each other forever? About commitment? Or starting a family? Would you pledge your love 'til death do us part? Would you still have a big wedding to show everyone you know you're committed? Gift-giving would definitely be confusing as well. Would you register for an appliance, or would his-and-hers towels (that you can later split) be more appropriate?

My point? Planning for a relationship to end before it's even begun sets it up for failure. If you don't think it will last, don't get married. If you do, go all in. Relationships are never predictable—they could last two years or twenty—and creating a timeline won't change that.

What do you think? Is a two-year marriage licence a good idea? If it was a possibility in Canada or US, would you consider it?
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PostPosted: Fri Oct 28, 2011 12:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I don't see the point of it.  If you're not sure, why not just live together?  I think it's a BAD idea because many young people today already have very little sense of commitment and this will only exacerbate that.  Here's an idea; make it MORE difficult to get married, (for example, mandatory courses on marriage and relationships), and easier to get divorced. I've been married for almost 40 years and we have had many rough periods.  Most people in our situation probably would have divorced, but, we were committed to working things out and, we DID.  Am happy to say, things have NEVER been better!
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PostPosted: Tue Nov 29, 2011 1:25 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi all,
The romantic in me wants to say I think this is wrong—an idea that completely disrespects the intentions of marriage: everlasting love, commitment, comfort and security forever.......
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PostPosted: Tue Nov 29, 2011 5:14 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

With divorce rates soaring, and widespread worries about a new culture of hyper-materialism, I think this is great idea to know if couples are compatible and really in love to marry.  love


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